Shut Up Iris

What?



I've been watching football for some time now. I've always been a Redskins fan, you may noticed from previous bloggings. Yet lately I get asked 'Are you a Tim Tebow fan?'. I always have the same answer: 'I am a Washington Redskins fan, the Denver Broncos aren't even in my division, I am indifferent to them unless they are for some reason playing the Redskins.'

The inevitable follow up comment is; 'Oh, you hate Tim Tebow just like everyone else.'

I don't know what any of this means? Why should I be a fan of players that do nothing for my team? Why do I have to hate Tim Tebow if I'm indifferent to his team? I have never been asked if I am a Ben Roethlisberger fan or a Tom Brady Fan, or even if I'm a Rex Grossman fan? Rex Grossman IS the quarterback for my Redskins, why do people not ask me about him?



Why would anyone ask me about Tebow? I live next to Chicago where the standard is Bears fans or Colt fans and yet even people in and around Chicago who should assume that I am a Bears or Colts fan still ask me 'Are you a Tim Tebow fan?'. Why does it matter? So for anyone asking, suck on this:




Oh, and when you type Roethlisberger Firefox auto correct wants you to use: Spitsbergen.

I don't know, but don't ask the NFL and it's employees because they don't know either. Now, first off the NFL is a trust. That is it is a group of businesses that act in concert to control their industry to set prices, wages and collectively bargain for various deals in the case of the NFL that mainly means television rights. The only reason the NFL can operate it's monopoly/trust is because of the agreement with the players union and the guv'mints turning a blind eye to the trust as it also does with Baseball and Basketball.



Of course that is gone since the collective agreement expired and is the basis for the Tom Brady lawsuit (brought solely by that douchebag Tom Brady because the Patriots are asses!*) that the NFL cannot collectively shut it's doors as doing so would be acting as a trust, yadda,yadda, yadda, monopoly, yadda,yadda, union desertification. All of this is as maybe. I'm a huge Redskins fan and a big football fan but if the season doesn't start on time? Fuck the NFL that's what. When baseball went on strike? I never watched it again. When Hockey went on strike? I never watched it again. Now it is the NFL's turn and I'll tell you why I will never watch it again.



How do you share 8 BILLION dollars? How about fifty-fifty? That's what the Players Union** proposed , which is magnanimous considering the old deal that the owners hated gave the players fifty two percent of NFL revenues. Why did that offer fail? Well the owners responded "Okay 50-50 it is EXCEPT that any revenues over projected revenues goes directly into our pockets." which as you can see, isn't exactly fifty-fifty. If revenues are under projections do the owners have to pay the players? It 's a dumb suggestion. Now I know what you are going to say "If the players don't like it, they can go work for someone else." except they really can't. The NFL is a trust and if you don't like your team/boss you can't sign anywhere else. Even if you go to Canada or the UFL you end up paying the NFL and that isn't going to change because the NFL is a litigious motherfucker with more money than Canada much less the CFL. So, if you are an NFL player and the NFL won't let you play, or your team won't let you play then you're fucked. It's time to fall back on that 'Communications' Degree. So, fuck the NFL.



Now before you say "You player loving, union hugging, commie subversive, pinko, Obama shorts liberal!" let me just say fuck the players too. In a calculated ploy they legally de-certified the union which let that ass Tom Brady* file his lawsuit. This move is probably as illegal as the NFL trust and simply makes the players look like cry baby millionaires. Which they totally are. The players main complaints? Rookies are being paid too much: they were being paid inline with your unions agreement, how come you complain now? Retired Players have no safety net: Really? Someone making on average three million dollars for a couple of years work needs a safety net for retirement? Go fuck yourself. Maybe the old-timey players that worked summers as roofers or in a car wash deserved a nice retirement cut but none of you current fuckos do. Save you money and invest. Either that, or take up bull-riding.



Or boxing.



Billionaires vs. Millionaires, I'm not siding with either one I don't make anywhere near either of them and to be honest if I had NFL talent I'd sign for three years and then laugh all the way to retirement riding a wave of dividend stocks , hedge funds and tax free trusts. So sack up and get a deal done before the season is impacted.


* Actually it is the Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, and Drew Brees and five other schmoes anti-trust suit. Tom Brady is listed first because of the alphabet and because everyone in the football media hates him. I personally rank him as #3 quarterback ever, behind #2 Terry Bradshaw and #1 Joe 'Cool', if Brady wins another ring..............we'll see.

** The union as I mention later technically no longer exists.

You may have noticed, or maybe not. The layout is different and stuff and over at the side Intensedebate has been added. I did this because, well , just about all comments were from spammers and I don't want to sort through that shit. Sign up for Intense debate once and you can log in an comment at any time.

That's it that's all I have to say today. Except that the NFL and the lockout sucks and I predict that Sebastian Vettel repeats as Formula 1 World Challenge.

Now, go back to whatever it is you are supposed to be doing. Assholes.

Yes, I am a Washington Redskins fan. Raised in Chicagoland during the Bears sucky years before and after the 1985 Superbowl season, it was Washington that often played on TV when the Bears were blacked out, and then in three terrific Superbowls. Players like Doug Williams, John 'Diesel' Riggins (you loveable drunk you) Art Monk, Earnest Bynar, Russ Grimm (and all the Hogs!) and of course the Chief himself, Joe Gibbs. Not only is the name 'Redskins' hilariously racist, the 'Skins have a proud tradition of winning, and playing hard and gritty football. While many Washington fans are always down on Clinton Portis, mainly for his injuries, I believe that he deserves respect and has many qualities that I personally admire.



First Clinton Portis is dedicated. In an age where many high paid players refuse certain roles, show up late for practice, camp, refinishing Coach Shananigan's deck, Clinton Portis is a team player. He is a throwback to when running backs didn't just carry the ball, they blocked and worked out of the back field as a receiver and he doesn't complain about any of those things. Better yet, he excels at all of them. He can run up the middle or slash out towards the sidelines. He can catch and run behind a screen or go deep or run a crossing route. He also gladly sacrifices his increasingly brittle body to block for the increasing number of pointless Redskins quarterbacks. There are so many teams that require a personnel change depending on what play they call and what role the running back needs to play. How many high paid running backs do we see that won't or simply can't block? How many teams are hampered by the fact that opposing defenses know that a running play isn't coming because they've just subbed in the 'receiving' running back. It's increasingly rare for a running back to do everything that is asked of him, and even rarer yet to have one that is good at all of it.



Second, Clinton Portis is fun. Off the field Portis's antics are fun, and he has fun. He's not out raping college chicks in bathroom stalls, or dog fighting, or endlessly riding around on a lawn mower, he does what we all would do were we rich. He goes out, dresses up and has a blast. It's always interesting to see a player in the NFL that finds ways to liven things up without getting arrested for drunk driving or hit and run. Sure his 'fun' side is laced heavily with 'crazy' but it's not the 'go with your friends on a drive by' type of crazy, it's the 'put on the funny teeth and act like a fool ' crazy. He doesn't always pull it off, but at least he tries.



Good old Clinton Portis, he's as cool as he is dedicated. What do I mean by cool? Have you ever seen or heard Clinton fly off the handle at a reporter? Never has he shouted or berated anyone at a press conference, no matter how inane the questions are. Like Doug Williams (remember the 'how long have you been a black quarterback' incident?) Clinton can't lose his cool. Even on the field, he runs angry, but he's all cool as soon as the whistle blows. Some people say he's too detached. Although if you're saying that you're probably some cracker-ass honky that just don't know what cool is. Clinton has cool, baby.



Finally the man has PRIDE. Shocking I know. He is one of the few players on the 'Skins that takes every set back personally and redoubles his efforts to lift his team. The three seasons that Clinton has been injured and out, it's been entirely because he came back too early to try and play. This season is a prime example. After missing three games with what should have been a season ending 'groin separation' he came back. Why? Pride. The 'Skins needed a running back and Clinton would be damned if serious pain would hold him back. So he came back, ran brilliantly, plastered a couple of defensive backs that tried to sack McNabb, and you guessed it, injured himself again and even worse. So for you Redskin 'fans' that say 'He's too injury prone' let's remember he is one of the few Redskins that will put his body on the line so that YOUR team can have a fighting chance.

So, in closing, here is to you Clinton Portis. You've been patient with douchebag fans, idiot coaches and a team owner with more money than sense and you've played damn good football with tenacity, pride and good sprinkling of crazy, balls, and of course pride. I for one, will miss you when you do retire. I also hope that retirement isn't soon. We need you, look at Ladian Tomlinson: take your time, get better and get back to us when your groincological region isn't separated.

Oh and Kyle Shanahan can't Offensive Coordinate his way out of a wet paper bag, if it wasn't for his dad being a head coach, he wouldn't have a job

I found this article which supports nicely what I said in a previous blog post about the waste in the CIA and how much I hated it. So I was about to write an article lauding 'Veterans Today' and their adoption of my obviously enlightened stance on the CIA and how it should be abolished and the money used to build a super-robot President that we can just turn off when he says something stupid, but first I looked around their site.

I found stuff I agreed with: The USA shouldn't support our 'allies' that work against us (I'm still looking at you Israel) the CIA should be banned, let's not bomb Iran and lets get out of Iraq and Afghanistan. I then also noticed articles about world Zionist conspiracies, 9/11 and 'false flag' operations and John McCain=EVIL! I noticed that many of the views I hold are presented right alongside views that I consider the domain of crazy whack-jobs.

So I started thinking, am I a crazy whack-job? Is that how people see me??



So then I noticed I have guns, quite a few guns, one of them being an assault rifle. I also noticed that in my office are ten ammo cans and a quick guesstimate is that I've stock piled nearly three thousand rounds of ammunition. I go shooting fairly often, but not that fucking often. I also have a closet full of MRES, for camping, but fuck camping. Water purifiers a gas-mask and a uniform fit for a plucky 1940's British Commando, complete with beret. I own a fez with a Turkish Army General Staff badge on it and I get gun catalogs everyday, and some survival catalogs too.

Fuck, I may be a nutjob. I always thought maybe I was just more sensible than everyone else but maybe not, I could just be a bit off in my mind-tank.



Now I don't advocate overthrowing governments, I'm against that because being very lazy that shit sounds like a lot of work and I'm not wiling to do that. I don't think 9/11 was an inside job it was just a monumental fuck up by the Bush administration. I don't think the Jews that run Hollywood are out to get Oliver Stone, they probably just want to make movies. I've also said my peace about calling any politician 'evil', they are just politicians and just because they don't support what you support doesn't make them evil. Manipulative liars maybe, Evil? No.

So what do we take away from this?

First: Veterans Today is a great source for news and commentary not covered by 'mainstream' media. Second: they also are brave for allowing some nutjobs to articulate their nutjobbery. Third: If the Guv'mint gets on my lawn, they IS gettin shot! Fourth: No news source or blog should be judged by some 'fringe' thinkers and that we should applaud news sources that bring in those fringe ideas so that we can debate them as a society.

I would also like to point out that I filled in my census forms completely and mailed them back in plenty of time. Am I a whack-job? Maybe, but I think that might be okay.